Liam the lawyer

Liam has been very argumentative lately, trying out all sorts of "what if" scenarios.

"Time to go to bed, Liam." "What if I don't go to bed?"
"The car can't drive itself, Liam." "What if the car does drive itself?"
"Don't stab me with the [balloon] sword, Liam." "What if I do stab you?" [stabbity stab stab]

This evening we were discussing his repulsive habit of spitting out half-chewed food if he suddenly decides that he doesn't want it anymore.

"If it goes in your mouth, Liam, you chew and swallow it." "What if I spit my gum in the trash can?"

I give up, Liam wins (which itself needs to be another post - the boy is turning into a seriously sore loser!).